Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Round 3.

I'm titling this Round 3 because I'm pretty sure this is my 3rd come back!! hahahaha!! 

We are in Florida in our new house and loving every minute of Nolan Edward!  This kid keeps us on our toes, Gray and I are amazed at how much we love him and how adorable we think EVERYTHING he does is!!  It's so funny!!  I've been trying to get Nolan sleeping in his own bed (that's for another post) but last night we couldn't seem to leave his room because we just kept watching him play instead of sleep then when he finally fell asleep we couldn't seem to walk away because he looked so adorable!  Note:  when I say, "leave his room" I mean the doorway trying not to be seen.  My husband is not so good at the being quiet part...he just wants Nolan to know so bad that he's there and Gray wants to swoop in and pick up Nolan SO BAD!  It's kind of hilarious although I'll be the one to calm Nolan down if Gray gets him up.  Gray has officially been threatened with his life if he wakes Nolan up again!! 

The first night we had Nolan in his bed, Nolan fell asleep pretty easily and I was thinking this is going to be easier than I thought!  Little did I know Gray thinks the baby monitor is the coolest invention ever.  Side story:  I guess guys don't know about or ever pay attention to a baby monitor.  I never thought about that until recently; I knew all about baby monitors from my babysitting days and seeing them at friends' houses.  Gray, not so much.  Back to the original story, I had the monitor on the "voice activation" setting (not on purpose), as my sweet little man is sleeping in his crib I hear a loud cry come out and run in to see my little man awake and Gray looking guilty but laughing REALLY hard.  I was frustrated because I knew Gray did something just not sure what.  Gray kept saying, "Sara, I'm sorry but that was hilarious!!"  I sternly told him waking Nolan up was not hilarious!  Gray said, "you didn't hear that?"  All I heard was Nolan crying....Gray went up to the monitor base and using his arm pit made a loud farting noise (which woke Nolan up)!  Because of the setting of the monitor it didn't pick up the farting noise, just Nolan crying!!  Gray thought he was so funny, I admit, I did laugh but after I got Nolan back to sleep...again!!

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Don't call it a comeback....

That's right, I'm coming back!! Not a day goes by that I don't think about something to blog about!  It's time to get back on the wagon and document this crazy life of ours!!  New post coming later...hahahaha!!!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Hosptial and Newborn Photos!! part I

My sweet neighbor and friend, Holly, took these pictures for us in the hospital then came over to take newborn photos of Nolan Edward!  I had EVERY intention of doing a birth announcement with these photos but life has gotten in the way.  Let's face it, I can barely get thank you notes out (just kidding mom)...but not really!! :)

sweet baby face!!

Gray found many uses for the boppy!
My favorite hospital band....FALL RISK!  (always makes you feel good!)
proud daddy!

Nolan Edward Ange!
These were all on taken May 4th, 2011.  Nolan's birthday!! 

Monday, July 11, 2011

blogging failure.

Well, I haven't blogged in a month and a half. I lay in bed and think about all the stuff to blog about and it's overwhelming!  There has been so much wonderful for us and so much "are you kidding me?!!"  in the past month and a half!  The wonderful would be our amazing Nolan!  We just love that guy like no other!  I don't know how Gray is going to go back to work because so many times during the day we call each other over (stop whatever you are doing) and come look at the cuteness in front of us!!  We are totally in love with him!! I have so much updates about him, he is changing so much!  Of course, we think he's the cutest ever and everything he does is adorable...even when he cries!! 
The "are you kidding me?!!" is our house.  A week and a half before we were supposed to close, the girl who was buying our house couldn't get her loan approved.  Note to self:  don't take an unpaid vacation the month before you are supposed to buy a house!!!  AAAHHHHH!!  Gray and I were really disappointed to say the least!  The good news is, about 3 weeks later (one week ago) we got another contract on our house.  I'm not convinced this person is much smarter than the the original offer she wanted our bedroom set WITH OUR MATTRESS!  Do you really want a strangers mattress??  I am trying not to be too skeptical but already in my mind this lady has, "I'm going to take an unpaid vacation this month" written all over her.  (it wasn't just the mattress, a few other things too!)  As of now, we are set to close on or before August 5th!  We are planning to get back to FL before then, just not sure.  Add that to the list of unknowns in our life. 
One thing we do know is we have a precious baby that is the sweetest guy we have ever met!  Gray and I are loving every day with Nolan Edward Ange!!!

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Coming home from the hospital.

I had Nolan on Wednesday, May 4th and on Friday, May 6th Dr. Newman and the nurse said if I was ready to go home I could or I could stay another night.  There really wasn't anything they could do for me at the hospital that my mom or Gray couldn't have done for me at home!  :)  Gray and I decided mid-morning that we would try to leave the hospital by late Friday afternoon.  I went in to the hospital with a bad cold and by Friday I started coughing really bad and my nurse was a little concerned about what she heard in my lungs.  With my lung history, the nurse called Dr. Newman and ordered a chest x-ray. I also requested something for the coughing because it was hurting to cough and I just wanted it to go away!  Thankfully, my chest x-ray came back normal...just stinky to feel so miserable!  They advised me to take Robitussin DM when I got home and continue my other pain medicines.  Gray and I were so excited to leave with Nolan but a little nervous too.  They let us leave the hospital with a newborn, no Dept. of Family and Children's Services involvement or anything!!  Just us with a 2 day old baby!!  Craziness.

Because I was feeling pretty poorly, I didn't get any pics of Nolan in his "coming home" outfit by himself not in his carseat ( -1 for mom).  I wasn't totally thinking I felt like we had moved into the room and we had a lot to get out.  Here are our pictures of us leaving the hospital, a family of 3!  :)

As we left our room I was creeping through the hall (because it's hard walking quickly after a c-section people!) and Dr. Newman happened to be coming out of another room waiting to deliver a baby so I asked her if we could get some pictures!  She was so sweet and said she would love to, she also asked the nurse walking by to please get me a wheel-chair, I was trying not to be dramatic but it sure was nice to not have to walk!!  (doesn't she just look so nice?!  LOVE her!!)

We got the wheelchair and Dr. Newman stayed with us and took pictures for us! 

Our Nurse Kelly came out with us and took this picture of us, not my favorite picture of myself by good documentation anyway!! 
Coming home we took the back roads, Gray decided we didn't need to chance it on the interstate! :)  I called my mom (who was at our house already making dinner) to let her know we'd be arriving soon with Baby Nolan!

We had to show Nolan his room!
Welcome Home Nolan Edward, Welcome Home!!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Interrupted Sleep, Interrupted Life.

This morning at 4:45 am I found myself laying in bed thinking, "if I'm very still Nolan won't hear anything and he'll fall back to sleep!!"  I stayed in bed for a few minutes thinking my 2 week old may soothe himself, but he didn't.  I felt a tad guilty that I would lay there hoping for more sleep.  He's only 2 weeks old, what was I really expecting?  Sadly, I thought the same thing at 7:45 when he started fussing again.  Poor guy!  Of course, I got out of bed and got him up and I fed him.  When I was holding him the guilt of feeling like I needed more sleep was weighing heavy on me.  How selfish.

I was feeling especially guilty because last night (around 11 pm) as Gray and I were laying in bed and I was feeding Nolan, Gray and I were talking about what a gift Nolan is to us and how he truly came in God's time!  This has been a late night discussion for Gray and I for several nights now.  We feel so incredibly blessed to have him and he is just perfect in every way!  I told Gray I can't believe that last July I sat in Dr. Newman's office and just cried because I so desperately wanted a baby and I was looking for any way to make that happen and hoping she would help.  She did offer to put me on some fertility meds but she also said that she didn't think I needed it and I would become pregnant in time.  She offered to put me on meds because she saw my desperation, my tears and knew all too well the heartache I was feeling for a baby.  I left her office with a prescription but chose to not fill it and to lean on her advice and wisdom.  It was the end of August that I found out I was pregnant! In God's time, not ours!

Gray and I can definitely see a recurring theme throughout our marriage and our lives.  We get disappointed, feel like it's the end and in God's time things are brought full circle and we look back and can't believe where we came from and don't know how we made it out.  This past spring, I did a Deeper Bible study with my church on Priscilla Shirer's study of Jonah.  That was perfect timing for me because it was about the interrupted life and how our messes are made beautiful by God in His time.  One thing I have in my notes is, "sometimes the greatest message is the mess of your life."  That is so true for us, we have a story that is still being written.  Yes, we currently have messes in our lives but we also have hope and second chances all around.  The last 3 years have been the hardest for me personally and for Gray and I as a couple because I have felt consumed with mess.  I felt like it was one disappointment after another.  Yes, I have a perfect newborn sitting by my side as I type, but I truly believe God has transformed our hearts.  It's not about us just having a baby, it's about life and dealing with the mess and trying to find the message within.  When my mom was here helping me after Nolan came she really encouraged me to pray about my feelings about certain issues and ask God why I am feeling the way I do.  I am in the process of doing that and haven't had any breakthroughs yet...but I know God will show me.  It may take a while, I'm a little on the stubborn side which doesn't help! :)

Here is what Jonah cryed out to God while he was inside the whale, I can't begin to tell you how many times I have felt this and wish I could tell you I responded in the same way as Jonah.  Instead, I chose to fight and take on the "woe is me" attitude."  I am still working on this and need to be reminded daily that this isn't about me:

"From inside the fish Jonah prayed to the Lord his God.  He said:  
In my distress I called to the Lord, and he answered me.  From the depths of the grave I called for help, and you listened to my cry.  You hurled me into the deep, into the very heart of the seas, and the currents swirled about me; all your waves and breakers swept over me.  I said, I have been banished from your sight; yet I will look again toward your holy temple.  The engulfing waters threatened me, the deep surrounded me; seaweed was wrapped around my head.  To the roots of the mountains I sank down; the earth beneath barred me in forever.  But you brought my life up from the pit, O Lord my God.  When my life was ebbing away, I remembered you, Lord, and my prayer rose to you, to your holy temple.  Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs.  But I, with a song of thanksgiving will sacrifice to you.  What I have vowed I will make good.  Salvation comes from the Lord. 
And the Lord commanded the fish and it vomited Jonah onto dry land."    Jonah, chapter 2

While it's hard to be thankful for life's interruptions, I sit with a full heart today thankful for the interruptions I've had and the miracles and appreciation I have from those interruptions and experiences gained!! 

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Proudest Daddy Around!!!

Gray is SO in love with Nolan...I better watch out because Nolan definitely has his dad's attention!! It is so sweet!  Because of my c-section I wasn't able to do as much in the hospital and Gray just stepped up like he's been doing this forever!  I couldn't believe how much Gray did without hesitation or question of himself....I found myself asking Gray if he thought certain things I was doing was right or not!  Gray was a pro at suctioning Nolan's mouth (which had to be done frequently the day of his birth), G was the main burper (and still is), Gray handled all the diapers (unless he lucked out and a nurse was checking Nolan then the nurse would handle it).  I didn't change a diaper until we came home!  Gray has just been amazing, I never doubted his greatness but he hasn't been around newborns either so I didn't know what he would do!  Gray and I have had a strong marriage,  I am more in love with him now than ever before!  He is looking out for Nolan and I and truly being the dad God has called him to be!  I love my baby daddy!!!  :)
Here are some pictures of Gray with Nolan in the hospital...
Gray took the majority of pictures we have from the hospital and I was able to take a few of him as I could!  I love this man and this baby!!